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Awarenessssss of Self Deception

by Ahavat Olam on July 26, 2018 at 6:18 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

One of the hardest things for any ego or idea of creation to conceive is its own existence.  It spends most of its life time enthralled by the senses it loses sight of the big picture.  How does this help the common man?  It is just one of the many paths to a certain kind of freedom.  The ultimate freedom, of course.  Its the only outcome for such thinking.

Continuing on that path is another thing entirely, and in each individual it manifests in the reality around and through the practitioner.  Perhaps you use it to reach success and profit, that would be great if we all did that, instead of using that time for profit and success at the expense of others reality.  Either torture or starving to death.  Both are ripe full of metaphors.

What isn’t, what shouldn’t be, what has to be; and  what won’t always be?  Do these all share the same answer(s)?  How many of those are based on the senses?  Why do I ask so many questions all at once?

To simply ask what is reality is incorrect, to ask what comprises my reality is correct.  Even husks and machines are able to ask that question because their birth is not the same, there could be similarities, but differences would arise also.

Humans though, thrive on keeping its tribes isolated and strong, inclusive yet warm unless threatened.  Once offended the tribe should not be quick to open communication unless the offender has redeem itself.  Justice.  The scales of balance.  If grudges persist, then Justice was not carried out.  For the entire existential construct should do its job and end a matter once and for all, so that new matters could be attended to.

Truth and Courage combine to create Justice, as it can only be weighed with real evidence and reliable sources.  Of a truth, there does not seem to many reliable sources in this day in age.  It can be restored quite easily, in the manner of self understanding or Know Thyself, self awareness also known as To Thine Own Self be True, family or blood, which is to Establish good and strong roots to bear quality fruit, each transaction with your neighbor who hopefully has also reached this level last, rather than missing some kind of liberation from “foreign” and/or “domestic” influence[s] with the Self of all Selves.

That knowing unknowable, that barrier right after awareness of existence. This was the Deity creation and destruction power each human was granted as part or the whole of the gift of life.  It’s a shame to give it away.  There are many layers of wrappings, that once done, cannot be repaired.  That “innocence” is gone.

To take away anothers gift, even for a little while, what cures the foundation of Justice.  Do the right thing.

In America, its own Department of Justice is presenting a show before the world.  A spectacular and frightening show.  The corruption is just part of the deception.  What lies behind it all?  Most importantly, who lies behind it all?

Americans are realizing their own government has set up a great deal of its own disaster, with stolen consent from the people.  Stolen being, choices manipulated to cause many desired outcomes of decay and chaos.  What was the sacrifice for?

I can only really see in metaphors.  Right now, there is so much Chaos, and so little Order, nor love to repair this Great Imbalance.   Some of my posits are slightly subdued and greatly exaggerated by the English language.  It’s an interesting language.  It’s a great way to contain ones own chaos.

It is not perfect, but it is efficient and it gets the job done for my liking. This is all existential research.  Over twelve years in the making. These essays, this comic.  Other projects.  Work.  Family.  Other.  Self introspection and self delusions.

Pobodys Nerfect, right?

Remain in Light.

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Gettin’ There

by Ahavat Olam on July 18, 2018 at 1:54 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

Not bad, looks like there is some improvement going on.  I do realize there is insanity happening in the world right now.  I’m a little late, about a decade or so late from fulfilling my end of the “bargain”.  I’m ready to not give up, keep trying, and even though work is a little overwhelming, I know communication is the key to success.

I am learning another language, when that course is done, I will use that time I spent learning that language trying to improve my art, and perhaps writing.  I don’t really know HOW to improve other than just draw, and do some art lessons, then relax.

Synthetic Wisdom is my proof that A) I can do it, and B)My way of thanking “God” for all that I have been given.

In my real life, I am completely burnt out, and in desperate need of a vacation.   Part of me wants to go camping for a week, but I would probably accept a few days, then use the rest of the week to work on a script for a show.  I have an idea on how this project can come together, but the ideal would be to transition to something a bit more suited to my personality.  IT is fun and all, but I have a feeling I should be doing something more with my life.

The burden of wisdom and the love of it..

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A New Order

by Ahavat Olam on July 9, 2018 at 2:45 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

I wouldn’t be a human being if I didn’t stumble from time to time.

As a philosopher-mystic (a title that one can only give oneself after about a decade of existentialism) I tended to err on the safe side, or the “spiritual” side of life.  As a quick run down, to me spirituality is based on the physical, the intellectual, and the emotional aspects of life.  Those three when combined (when aren’t they?) make up the realm of the spirit.  As to what happens when we are asleep or dead, I am not at liberty to say.  That is up to the individual to decide.  It always has been.

Tyranny is about stripping away anothers free will for the sole purpose of “worship” or focusing ones intentions and attention upon that which is not the individual.  Hollywood is especially guilty of this crime as it has taken decades of focus and turned it into one long commercial for products that humanity never needed, nor asked for.  Yet, like all wars, it was fastened to their spirits as yet another burden.  Why do people, including myself, take on more burdens than we can handle, or that we need.

Some burdens are necessary, like caring for another human being.  Love can become a burden, but that is always shared, and it can be transformed into the greatest form of expression humanity has.  There is nothing greater than sharing a moment of bliss and openness with another human being.  Sex is a part of it, but the idea of sex has been commercialized and ruined to the point that humanity has abandoned Love and is now searching endlessly for a way to fill that void the exists within us all.  It has always existed.

Those who suffer from depression are more aware of this whole.  Where did it come from?  Its the result of realizing we cannot go back to the past, the days before cavemen, when protohumans roamed the earth moving from one moment to another, bound by the sun and sometimes the moon to live.  When a tribe formed, protecting followed next.  Protection led to invention.  The first invention was strategy, and the next actual tools and just found sharp rocks.  Is this actually the way it happened?  Who can say.  It doesn’t matter because the focus is on the void within us, and how it came to be.

When one does psychadelic drugs, the ego experiences a profound sense of “oneness” at the expense of ones sanity, or handle on reality.  All things become possible, minds are open, and a new awareness is gained.  It is through awareness that one found the self was alone, unless a moment was shared with another.  Love appeared when sharing moments was no longer equal.  For some reason, sharing a moment with a beloved is much better than sharing it with a friend.  If a family experiences an event, its much much greater and more profound than a group of good friends experiencing a good concert, or the heartache of combat.  Very few humans choose combat over family, this is brought up in the old texts, as man needed something greater than himself to fight and die for.  This isn’t a man-centric diatribe, as it is a brief look at what masculinity actually is, and not what Hollywood sells us as their image.

Such as God made man in His image, Hollywood tells us that its creates traits in its own terrible image.   Hollywood cannot exist without makeup, a camera, and a stage.  Nothing is real, and escapism is the norm.  Again there is a sacrifice of sanity, but in this instance, there is no profound sense of oneness.  There is only deception.

It takes a while for one to accept who and what one really is.

Finding another to accept you for who and what you are, is tough, but mankind is vast, and once that person is found, you never let each other go.  Afterall, life is too short to spend in misery alone.

This does not guarantee perfection, but when the dark times come, if one becomes the others light of day, humanity will be uplifted.

I have a lot of work to do tomorrow, and hopefully more strips to create.  I do not want to bring more chaos and confusion in the world, so I wish to talk about things coming together.

Existentialism is all about thought experiments, and its time for my previous experiments with Chaos to come to and end.

It is time.

Good luck with all of your endeavors, and may you find peace in yourself, and Love shortly thereafter.  I hope I find both of these things.  Where I live, love is not really meant for philosophers, but those dark ages are over.  Who really knows what the morrow will bring?  I pray for peace and not more endless war (chaos), like those who came before me.

Remain in Light!

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Never Gonna Give This Up

by Ahavat Olam on June 22, 2018 at 3:37 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

Its been quiet.  I allowed real life to stop me.  I also don’t have a set schedule sometimes, and I lie to myself about needing sleep.  That is what days off are for.

I want to do this every day, I endeavor to, but the will and desire is holding me back.  It’s moreso fear.  Is this something I am passionate about?  Longevity says yes, but the lack of continual updates says no.  A lot of this comes from being alone and not being a good company for artists.

With a heavy background in essays, one novel finished yet unedited, and several other novels attempted, I think I may doing alot of this wrong.  I’m not sure how creative people do this without creative support, its tough.  As an extrovert I have to do all of the talking, all of the initiation and it becomes tiresome.  No excuses though.  I failed many days, but not tomorrow.  It’s only a failure if I have given up.

I must find a way not only do this, but more, lots more.  I have to do this alone, apparently.  Even though I live in America, my friends will not help me create anything anymore.  They are all full, yet my cup has never been full, even after 17+ years of multiple thought experiments, all going at once.  So much lonliness, but why do I need fellow human beings when I have “imaginary” worlds of existentialism.  They are metaphors for layers so they are are not useless, its still escapism, but it still serves a purpose.

Its taking me a while to realize I’ve been kicked out of my Temple because I am working class.  I’m used to being ignored at churches that have it all, but since I do not like propaganda outside of philosophical tenets, my kind is not welcome, no matter my allegiance to Jesus the Christ.  I would like to reestablish His Order, but I do not wish to make an enemy of the Church now. I’m waiting for it to fall apart.

I have a new hobby, listening to the skies… “looking” for meteors.  I would like to get into astronomy at some point and transition away from IT and into a field of discipline.  IT is liberating and a great opportunity, but much like Security and Sales, its a bad fit.  In America we cannot live without money, and finding what our heart desires is very costly, so many people put their dreams aside so they can eat, and the existenial fear\hatred rots us out from the inside.

Eventually, and if not checked, the human becomes an empty husk.  Perfect for corrupted leaders, they now have fodder\sacrifice for whatever whim bad rulers can come up with to mask their incompetence in matters of state, as well as a way to hide justice\abuse (ethics and morals).

The people have a new hope in their heart, something big is coming.  The forces of evil, the ones in control and who told us the State of Israel was a good idea and still is, they are planning to fight Justice.  They cannot live in the truth, so they are getting the media and their other beasts to double down on chaos.

There is more coming, but I am getting tired, I must get up early tomorrow. Set a schedule, sacrifice sleep.

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That Comic About Protected Classes

by Ahavat Olam on June 11, 2018 at 11:01 am
Posted In: Uncategorized

Going to cut this one short, as I finished about 10 minutes after my comic cut off time for 6:30.  I give myself 1 hour to make a strip.  If I cannot conceive and draw a strip in an hour, I shouldn’t even think about setting my morning intention to do such things.  I also need to stop apologizing for the bad skillz, in time it will get better.  Today was a day of frustration, I was fighting the Microsoft Surface Tablet for the proper orientation, and the Tablet was also not registering its official stylus correctly.  Seemed wayy to heavy handed today.

Also, woke up with a lot of stiffness in the left side of my neck\body.  Living in America means I cannot afford to go to the doctor, protected classes can go for free, and at the end of the year I get to pay for their treatment, but any healthcare for me?  Nah.   I make too much for medicare\medicaid, whichever one I am supposed to take if I was poor, but I cannot afford “free” healthcare, nor can I afford “affordable” healthcare where government subsidies try to force me to pay 20% of my household income for a piece of paper that says “INSURANCE!” on it, so at the end of the year I don’t have to pay for the protected classes free healthcare, but rather, I have paid more than my fair share of their health care.

It would be sweet to go to a doctor, but even the services would break the bank.  What a strange system America has.  I pay for a select group of poor people to receive health care for free, yet since I am working tax payer “non-minority” I am expected to pay for others to have free health care.

Now I’m even more behind.  Its time for exercise and stretching!!

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