Schwofield

This is in response to my previous post.  I’ve planned some lofty goals, but I think I can do this.  I have to do this.  Not just for my self, but for all of humanity!!  It’s vital discipline is learned and the chaos of ones mind is finally put to an (proper) order.  Once I get bang out a Strip 6-7 days a week, I will be at a comfortable level to properly learn how to draw my way.  That’s what art is all about apparently.   Saturdays will be a throw back day, where I post my oldest work first, and work up to the last of the “lost” strips.  Including Sans Merit.

I’m about to head out on for a dog/house sitting adventure, so thanks to the Surface, I can continue making [my] strip.  Its pretty interesting, being on this isolated server on the internet.  There’s a vast ocean of content, and here I am on the fringe of that nightmare.  Here I am, afraid of my own mortality, overwhelmed by the existential angst of living in America and being overly aware of too many things.  Perception and Imagination are becoming one in the same.  A lot of questions are being answered in the Book of the Dead.  Things the Torah was only hinting at, and later what the Midrash exploited.

I like Wisdom, I love it/her.  I just wish I was a better student, rather than mining Chaos looking for Christos.  I found Tikkun Olam.  I was working on it, but I didn’t make the connection until after a personal revelation of time lost.  That’s the problem with depression or navel gazing.  You lose all concept of time.  All time becomes one endless moment of unbearable agony and despair. Each breath becomes hated, and each moment between them, that nothingness, becomes an all too brief relief.  To live in a moment between those living reminders.

Soo much self loathing and hated, for all living things.  That which is hated is considered unholy, and if one is blessed to have any order, that Order becomes the Holy.  This madness is a great conflict, I do not know what a physical battlefield is, but I do know when there are tyrants sapping away at myself and my loved ones.  I was given a beloved, a phantom to lose time and energy, and worst of all place focus on Wisdom and Her, rather than Wisdom and love for all men.  That’s the problem with Faith.  When it borders splitting the mind in too many directions, and then losing control of those self-made splits.

It is all one, it is all from one mind.  One source, one decree that caused the separation, not by choice, but by existing.  In mans eyes, not all men are created equal.