One of the reasons I cannot be Jewish is that I work 7 days a week, I am on Call 7 days a week, and my work schedule has a grey area of 18+ hours, with a hard 8 somewhere in the middle.

I do regret not serving in the Military, but now I know why I was not supposed to.

I don’t know what is supposed to go in my sketchbook, other than me being more inspired to finish Retail, if I can get 2 stores done, this upcoming weekend I can have a 4 player game.

There is some (p)intereste.

Also, I might be doing another side writing gig. No payment of course. I have a regular job that fulfills me enough to work for free, change the bots, wipe the spiders clean, sort of thing. There is a lot to do, and the hours are fleeting, the more I realize what MUST be done, and what SHOULD be done, as well as what Ought not be done, like Onanism.

The problem is inspiration, the lack thereof and depressions. How to carry on? Humans need a little down time, only a brief moment, reassess how to move forward, learn from past mistakes, pause, then ready, move forward again through the long endless trek though hell. Slaying demons and fallen angels alike. Trying to return to the Self.

Trying to Return to God.

In the end it happens to us all, but the FIGHT, the creation and sustaining of Order is what is most important. My works are not for me, but to help society move forward. I expose Chaos, not for it to be worshiped, but for it to be understood, loved, appreciated, and Order can be established, properly. Not while there is so much deceit mind you.

So many systems to fix or start, or end, or pause, all for it to stop in the end, or least the acknowledgement or manifestation of such.