I started sketching strips again.  I finally went through my clipboard and separated out the various works in progress.  As of now, I have nine strips that need to be erased and put up, the newest one appeared after I spent this morning thinking about the story. I stopped myself from going too far, as I needed to now begin telling the various stories.  I really like that I can do anything with Synthetic Wisdom, because it mirrors my own learning paths.

Erasing my hard handed sketching is very time/energy consuming.  I think It takes about fifteen to twenty minutes to get them as good as I can, including any touchup time.  I picked up some non photocopy blue pencils, and thus began my new sketching phase, a second season so to speak.  I just tested out scanning, and the result is I have to try to find a way to scan in greyscale for this to work properly.  So far using Mint, I can scan without installing any drivers, but I can’t change my color to grey scale.  I’ll do more research on this as time goes by.  Or, if I don’t, then expect a few blue lines in random places.  I’ll try to get ’em all.

By then I’ll have developed a taste for using real pencils with softer graphite, so I can erase those better.  Digital is still several months away, but in the meantime I have to get back to my regular schedule of creation.  Six days a week were devoted to sketching comics, sometimes I would get two in to make up for my day of rest.  Usually depression or some other stupid reason appears and I am forced to retreat from my actualized prayer, aka creating what my heart desires.  To draw a strip every day until the day I die.

I also don’t want cartooning to be the sole factor of my life, but I would like to keep it my covenant with the Creator of all things, since simply living doesn’t seem to be enough, for me at least.  There is a song that captures a faith based depression as well: Simple and Clean by Utada Hikaru.

In a book I finished reading titled: Jewish Meditation, it ends talking about a mans relationship to a woman.  Can the same be said for same sex partners?  Metaphorically they both contain love, but end with the message of capacity to create life.  Perhaps a barren woman could be able to create “easier” than making a man’s body capable of replicating such a thing.  There’s a presumption based on humans logic in that either they know everything, or that man can place a limit on its Creators abilities.  Can ego transcend itself?  The answer is no, or at least not as far as we can understand, or even have a need to.  Is such a thing even possible?  If you search out wisdom and only wisdom you will become satisfied enough to seek out happiness.  That’s all we can do, is try to be happy for as long as possible.

It’s easier for some than others.  There also seems to be a correlation between love and happiness, but both are based heavily upon ones relationship with their self.  I look into a mirror and I have to convince myself that the image before me is me.  The one thinking these thoughts.  Once I realize that the physical self before me, and the thinking self are one in the same, I am not a big fan of how my body has turned out, or my treatment of it.  This is why I treat others badly, because I did not know how to treat my self.

Once I stop looking into the mirror, my mind takes over every aspect of my being, overriding my senses themselves at times.

There are too many I statements in this blog.  Maybe next time there won’t be.



“But does that mean I have to walk on water?”