To me the Truth is so great, that while I cower here under periods of intense black anxiety aligned angst, I would allow any other man to what needs to be done in order to expose the Truth in my stead.  Passing the buck to a higher power, or realizing there isn’t anything more I can do except stay alive and do what I can, that’s probably the better outcome.  Staying alive in manic episodes of hedonism has to be allowed, but not allowed to conquer the entirety of ones being.  This is the problem with extremes, and why humanity works better in teams than alone.

I am always searching for a team of people that would like to work towards a certain goal.  While the ultimate goal would be Tikkun Olam, the pen ultimate would be a cartoon show.  Working on it would help me fix the churches and those properly tune them, like crystals.  I want them to each become like a pure prism.  I like using the Torah as grounding rod, but the aspect of judgment is not that is actively practiced there.

All “Holy” grounds are to grow crops.  Unless a person is a mystic or a philosopher focus, the rabbis should be growing the people like crops also.  Hobbies teach critical thinking.  The more the better, but as with wisdom, the point isn’t to fall with only that (it helps), but to be fascinated so much by something that you begin to recognize the same patterns in everything else.

Certain chuches would have specialities, but all who enter will receive a place to live, food, and the ability to learn skills and anything really.  Each church would be open an entire weekend, from shabbas to sunday sundown.  Two whole days of bbq, beer, betterment, and barriers.  A true sanctuary.  In all truths, even though everything is allowed to grow, the idea is that all things are medicine.  There are times and proper places of things, but spending over a decade in a very dark place, it was a curse, but one where I could learn many things about life.

Oh a truth, I would have been able to be a much more effective human being if I would have been offered a realm of complete sanctuary.  A place where the chaos is contained and life is lived.  Then we can bring the spirit of Truth with us, each more confident that we are getting stronger, every day.  This is how we prepare and stop the entrance to something powerful.   This also empowers local communities especially as people can now return to walking to a church instead of driving halfway across town.  I am thinking of bringing this idea to a local church, so even in typing this, I feel a bit more emboldened to help out in a way I can.  To help bring balance back into the world.

That is how you cleanse governments as well.  Once the people are healing, they make more direct, powerful, and correct decisions.  Anyone at the top has the ability to speak the Truth and bring back proper Order, but their actions seem to be oddly proportional to the people.  Are the people who bring about chaos into this world going to stop their behavior and seek balance?  It will happen regardless.

Is there ever a Great Balance of either of one?  This is one of the (few) times I all with one of the major forces and you could trade Order for Truthers, but there is a reason why Chaos was allowed to reign for so long, and why even a great Order would not need to last.  This is a harmonious Great Balance would occur.  Its the ‘God’ realization that all things are One and cannot be separated from its creator, because Creation is indeed a Love that we come near in very specific moments in life.   There is a danger in this realization without a proper ground, which represents the Great Imbalance of which we are apart of, while we are alive.

When we are no longer here, we are no long experiencing the imbalance of duality in every facet of our being.  That split creating chasms and caverns of the insanity that lies within us all.  By some kind of divine grace, some of us are able to place lights and create proper and rewarding pathways to transverse.

An endless cavern that has no physical exit, unless you make one.  So it is forced to experience the world around it, and itself.  Our entire world exists within the mind.  We create what we want, and are capable of our own great repairing.  It has nothing to do with strength or will when it comes down to it.  The power of forgetting a thing, erasing it from existence.  To be no more remembered, for evil, or for good.  In my country, my government works with businesses and agencies to not only destroy events, but to forget the lessons.  I understand this is the cost of doing business, but if each house\neighborhood\borough\city\state\ is a server of truth, then the effects would be much easier to deal with.  Well, those responsible would be able to be dealt with properly.

The state is a much more effective power of governing than any federal State could be, especially if the cities and citizens did it themselves.  Would there hierarchies exist?  In various fashions, federalized medium would have to exist to make sure the States do not rip each other to shreds.  Also, a strong system of standards should be upheld, not enforced.  The point is trying to create a standard, not become one.  Any regulation should be a national issue.  The problem and solution to waste is, that we believe that anything unusable to refuse and should be tossed.  On the contrary, the first goal and gaining the last superpower award would be the one who not only has zero waste, but it is able to start cleaning up.

Reprocessing is done by students and its a civic duty. Some governments that love their people, would reward the behavior with celebrations, or a new national holiday of drinking and festivities, a week when the task is complete.  Wisdom and the one that created it (as well as ALL the things), assures me that any all problem can be solved if enough people are willing to make it happen.   In each moment you are doing a thing you are like a god.  You are able to experience something because you are alive.  When you realize it what that it means all things become like light.

The more of a fascination one has with things and stuff, never turning ones mind off.  Tryants tell us that not all humans are fascinated by learning.  There is a reason society feels like its being ripped apart at the seams.  As more people wake up to the great(er)(est) deception(s), they hear the voice of chaos.  You don’t actually want to hear her voice.  Trust me.  Please, stay from her.  There is a reason why we are where we are.

There is also a reason why I feel my beloved is both far away from me and in grave danger.  I would rather say that humanity is my beloved.  As for someone who sadly suffers silently with a mental disorder that I could not prove exist to another person, such as they cannot prove me theirs.  I accept that everyone suffers either as great or greater than me, which is why I question how much longer humanity actually has.

Although I project my angst upon others, I do not do so with my level of concealment.  Thanks to growing up with the internet, and now after so many veils have been lifted, with some yet to be, I cannot fully trust another person to be able to love them on any level unless its with my Other.  Who is she? This is part of the insanity of life, the inner intuition that guides us with dreams, and thoughts, and visions of what is to come.

Who knows the future?  Who cares?  I want to fix the present to ensure a better future than the one I am afraid of.  Truth.  Love.  Courage.   I seek my Love with my spirit (because physically its an impossibility it seems).  In the meantime I have to summon my courage to tell things that are true and act upon them.  How shall I find her with my spirit?  Send it out through some mental manifestation, or find a way to prepare something for her.  Something I would be proud to bring her home to.

It’s not because of my choice of wine, or mystics poverty, or even my cowardice.  It is because of the land around me, even the land she lives in.  Although I have no idea on the Truth about that matter, because of the media, the government, the church, and those who say they keep the land allow such upheaval to occur.

I have no true sanctuary to offer.  My closet, yes it is quite large, but even that houses my various costumes and hats.  Never the robes I really want to wear.  The robes I do want to wear, the temple that houses them would not approve of me, I have to earn them.  Right now, it seems through deception.  They do like it like when I talk to them.  Which is why the place I would love to go for peace and sanctuary resonates with a frequency of chaos.  Even in this time of great Excess.

If there is a reasoning behind any great evil, and if its collective will were the manifestation of its source (one of the many names of upheaval perhaps, or Upheaval herself).

This is how you fight to source of the destruction part of humanity.  Which which not only turns into nothing, but it often times hardens and emboldens the remainder to fight back and resist.  As for any teachers of the land, they are very important healer.  It is important to drink from the deepest of our wells.  This is the importance of history.  We can purify or poison the water table of truth, and of the Ultimate Truth, we are only hurting humanity.  Just as we can neither lose our own conscious memory, we cannot lose our proper sense of history, which is kept right now through various governing bodies.  All existential currently, and not kept up properly because we are fighting amongst ourselves so a few can benefit.

We are even sold the story we are fighting for our fathers sake and not our sons. How many wars have our fathers carried because their fathers also did the same, or worse, actively worshiped the strange gods of sorrow(bad people).  I won’t tell you what god to worship or not to worship.  That wouldn’t be right.  I could be a great villain or one of the many messiahs humanity needs.   There is no perfection in character, but perfection is spirit to do what is right because it is the thing to do.  Nothing else matters.

I have to learn that lesson at every moment of every second, every day.  When I am in the darkness, these thoughts resonate in an cavern of my mind I spend some time… when I fall in.  Each time it feels like the worst time.  Knowing its neither the first nor the last, but an eternity of mental anguish that is sometimes physically painful.  Hopefully. you have never suffered like that, but to each his own variation of the depths of their shadow.

The darkness is the same, the light shows its not, but in the darkness, there is a sanity to be found in that fact.

There is no need to entertain destruction when it us at an others expense.